Marriage is an amazing thing and getting married is probably one of the happiest times is one’s life. But deciding on a person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life is definitely not that easy. One needs to put in a lot of thought and observation into knowing their partner before they decide on getting married to them. We often hear married couples arguing and saying things like “You never told me about this before” or “I should have got to know this before our marriage”. So communication and knowing your partner is undoubtedly a very important step that you cannot miss upon while getting married. Though knowing these things do not ensure a trouble free wedding life but it can help in maintaining a healthy married life. Here are top 10 such things about your soul-mate that you should be well aware of before you decide to get hitched with them.
10. HOUSEHOLD CHORESAsking your fiancé about whether s/he is comfortable doing laundry after marriage might sound a little inappropriate but household chores often make couples argue and fight with each other. In order to avoid such arguments it’s better to have an open discussion about what household chores your partner will be able to do and will they be comfortable while doing them. According to that a couple can divide the chores in advance so that they don’t have to live in a mess and chaos right from the Day 1 of their marriage.
9. HEALTH ISSUESKnowing about the health of your partner and any chronic diseases they might be suffering from is very important. Especially because you intend to have a family with them knowing about the diseases that can genetically transfer to your kids is something you cannot compromise on. Also getting test for AIDS and other STD’s is a healthy option as these doesn’t just affect your partner’s health but can also be a threat over your medical conditions. But make sure that you go about this in a sensitive manner as you partner might feel a little embarrassed about sharing such information with you. Talk to them gently without insinuating that you do not trust him/her.
8. FAMILY TRADITIONSMarrying to a person also means that you are entering in a whole new family which you have to accept as your own. Now it’s not necessary that your partner comes from a similar culture or a social background as you. His/her family might be having completely different traditions and customs that you have ever heard of. And being a part of their traditions is not just your responsibility as a spouse but it also affects your relationship with your partner. In such a situation you should ask your soul-mate more and more about how their family celebrates different festivals and what are the rituals that you will be expected to follow after marriage. This way you can avoid any future problems that you might have to face otherwise while adjusting in the family.
7. RELIGIOUS VIEWSKnowing about your partner’s religious views is also important as it can help you two bond on a better level. Knowing whether your partner is a believer, an atheist or an agnostic can help you understand them more. Also whether they like indulging in any religious practices like going to a church every Sunday is good to know in advance. If two of yours views match then it’s a great thing but even if they don’t then try to respect their beliefs while holding on to yours.
6. THEIR WEIRD HABITSA person can have a whole lot of weird habits and addictions that you would have never seen them possessing or even thought about. And once you get married all those habits get revealed and they might make you go crazy at times. Like they might need to sleep in a particular night outfit and cannot sleep at all if someday that night dress is left uncleaned. Or they might have a habit of reading newspaper in bathroom for long hours. These habits can creep you out or cause, though not very huge, but little troubles in your otherwise peaceful life. Thus it’s better to have knowledge about such habits beforehand.
5. FUTURE LOCATIONDeciding on a location in advance where you both agree on living during the first few years of your marriage is vital. Especially if you both are currently living in different cities or like if your fiancé has a great job offer in New York while you have better career prospects in Paris then it might get difficult to zero in on one city. You should openly talk about the pros and cons of both the places that you both want to live in, right before your marriage so that you do not have to get into unnecessary trouble afterwards.
4. FINANCIAL STATUSBefore tying the knot with a person one must be well aware of the financial status of that person. And it not just includes their salary and perks but also how much savings they have as well as the debts over them. You do not want to get any surprises after marriage or get into financial troubles so it’s also a good idea to have a clear picture about your soul mate’s financial status and whether that will be enough for both of you to lead a comfortable married life.
3. ABILITY TO MAKE COMPROMISESThe ability of your partner to compromise and make adjustments can go a long way in having a happy and successful marriage. “Because it’s not always rainbows and butterflies, it’s compromise that moves us along”. Well yes, that’s true. You do not need to test your partner on huge issues to see where they can make sacrifices to make you happy or not but a general observation over little things can tell you a lot about their personality and how easy or difficult it is going to be for you to adjust with them under the same roof.
2. VIEWS ON HAVING KIDSAgreeing upon the kids issues is a necessary thing in marriage or otherwise one of you will have to compromise big time. When it comes on the kids topic it’s not just whether you want to have them or not but also what number of kids you both want. Where one partner might intend on having six kids, the other might not be thinking about even one. Then when do you want to have kids and how they should be brought up. These are several important issues both the parents need to agree upon before starting their family. And it’s always better to discuss this stuff before marriage so that it doesn’t pop up problems later on.
1. EX FLAMESGetting to know about an old flame of your spouse after marriage can lead to unnecessary questioning and hostility between two while knowing about it from well before marriage is well accepted by most people. One should know about all the random flings to serious relationships their partner has been in before. Then it can be a puppy love in 4th grade or getting married in Vegas after a drunk night, confide in your partner about your relationship history so that they can also feel comfortable in confiding in you and sharing their romantic past without discomfort.
